Home > Adab (Manners), An-Nawawi, Enjoy Your Life, Hadith Gems, Muslim Homes, Muslimah, Salih al Munajjid, Scholars, What You Should Do In The Following Situations? > Beware of allowing non-Mahram (marriageable male) relatives to enter upon the wife in the home when the husband is absent

Beware of allowing non-Mahram (marriageable male) relatives to enter upon the wife in the home when the husband is absent

 

Some homes are not free of the presence of relatives of the husband who are not his wife’s Mahrams (unmarriageable male guardians). They may be living in his home with him due to particular circumstances, such as being students or single. These relatives enter the home without anyone raising an eyebrow, because they are known in the neighborhood as being relatives – brothers, nephews or uncles – of the head of the household. This relaxed attitude could generate a lot of evil which will earn the wrath of Allaah The Almighty if it is not controlled and brought within the limits set by Him.

 

The basic principle in this matter is the Hadeeth (narration) of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam:

“Beware of entering upon women.” A man from among the Ansaar (Helpers) said: “O Messenger of Allaah, what do you think about the brother-in-law?” He, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “The brother-in-law is death!”

(Reported by al-Bukhari, Fat-h al-Bari, 9/330)

 

An-Nawawi, (may Allaah have mercy on him), said:

“What is being referred to in this Hadeeth is the husband’s relatives, apart from his father and sons. These [his father and sons] are Mahrams for his wife and can be alone with her, therefore they are not described as ‘death’.

 

What is referred to here is his [the husband’s] brother, nephew, uncle and cousin, and others whom his wife would be permitted to marry if she were not already married.

 

Usually people take the matter lightly with regard to these relatives, so a man may be alone with his brother’s wife. Thus he is likened to death, indicating that he should be prevented from being alone with her even more than a stranger should.”

(Fath al-Bari, 9/331)

 

The phrase ‘the brother-in-law is death’ has a number of meanings, including:

  • The woman’s being alone with her brother-in-law may lead to spiritual destruction if she commits sin

 

  • It may lead to death if she commits the immoral act (fornication or adultery) and the punishment of stoning is carried out on her

 

  •  It may lead to the woman being destroyed if her husband leaves her because his jealousy leads him to divorce her

 

  • It may mean, beware of being alone with a non-Mahram woman just as you would beware of death

 

  • It may mean that being alone with a non-Mahram woman is as bad as death. It was also said that it means, let the brother-in-law die rather than be alone with a non-Mahram woman

 

All this stems from the concern of Islam to preserve families and households, and to prevent the tools of destruction from reaching them in the first place. Having learned what the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said, what do you think now of those husbands who tell their wives: “If my brother comes and I am not here, let him into the sitting room”, or a wife who tells a guest: “Go into the sitting room”, when there is no one else present in the house?

 

To those who raise the issue of trust as an excuse, saying: “I trust my wife, and I trust my brother, or my cousin”, we say, your trust is all well and good, and you should not be suspicious when you have no cause to be, but you should know that the Hadeeth of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam:

“No man is alone with a non-Mahram woman, but the Shaytaan (Satan, the devil) is the third one present with them.”

(Reported by at-Tirmithi, 1171)

includes the most pious of people as well as the most corrupt. Islam does not exempt anyone from such rulings.

[Dangers in the home, by Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid, page 5-7]

 

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  1. June 26, 2015 at 1:15 pm

    Subhanallah! This is so true it could cause so much fitnah. I wish people didn’t take it so lightly. Jazak allahu khayran for sharing

    Like

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