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Love of women- Dealing with lust— Sheikh Abd al-Hamid Kishk

July 7, 2018 Leave a comment

 

Women are the goal of the sexual appetite and the focus of desirous looks and in them, the lower self-finds its repose. The Almighty says

“And one of His signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may find comfort in them. And He has placed between you compassion and mercy.” (Quran 30:21)

 

Men spend most of what they earn on women and are their overseers because of their strength and their ability to protect them. If this appetite is confined within the limits prescribed by the Shari’a of Islam, it is a good thing and a blessing for society because it involves the establishment of the Muslim family on firm foundations of love, mercy, and affection. It is no wonder that one of the first commands which issued from the Almighty to Adam was:

“O Adam! Live with your wife in Paradise.” (Quran 2:35)

Allah did not say to him: “Live alone in the garden,” or “Live, you and your lover, in the Garden.” He said to him, “Live, you and your wife…” So Islam, the religion of Truth, calls for marriage and recommends it and urges it so that people will not be burdened with something they will not be able to bear. The sexual drive is a natural instinct which is beneficial if kept within limits but causes destruction and ruin if allowed free rein.

 

For this reason, Islam, with its true Shari’a, does not allow fornication. Fornication is a descent into vice, a plunge into a foul morass. Allah Almighty has connected the sin of fornication with idol worship and murder and He has made the punishment for, it to remain forever in the Fire in terrible, humiliating torment unless that is removed by sincere repentance, belief, and righteous actions.

 

Islam guides people to purification and purity. It establishes pure morals founded on fidelity and virtue. It flows like the pure sea to cleanse the earth of its filth, dirt and every impurity.

 

Allah put love of women before love of children. Love of children does not contain the same excess and extravagance as love of women. There are many men who exalt the love of women over the love of their children and so neglect their upbringing and deprive them of provision. There are many wealthy and powerful men who condemn their children to a life a poverty and abasement because they love another woman more than their mother. They become obsessed with such women and their passion distracts them from every duty. This is a great danger for society as a whole.

 

[Source: From the book, “Dealing with the lust and greed” p.13-14 (pdf)]

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Ruling of women cutting their hair -Shaykh al-Albaani

April 10, 2018 Leave a comment

 

Question: What is the ruling of a woman cutting her hair?

 

Answer: If the woman cuts her hair in order to resemble/imitate disbelieving or sinful women then it is not permissible to have this intention. If she cuts her hair in order to beautify herself for her husband, then I do not see anything that prevents her from doing so. There comes in Sahih Muslim* that the wives of the Prophet (peace be upon him) would cut their hair until it reached just below their earlobes.

 

From this Fatwa we benefit:

1. The permissibility of cutting the hair
2. The permissibility of cutting the hair in order to please the spouse
3. The evidence for this permissibility is found in Sahih Muslim*
4. The obligation of not resembling disbelieving women**
5. The impermissibility of also imitating openly rebellious/sinful Muslim women
6. A limit to how much is taken from the hair, which in this case is up to the earlobe
7. A woman’s hairstyle should not resemble men’s hairstyle

 

*In Saheeh Muslim Abu Salamah ibn ‘Abd al-Rahmaan said:

“The wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to cut their hair until it came just below their ears.”

[Baab al-Hayd, 320]

 

**This point can be understood from the hadith of Ibn ‘Umar that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said,

“He who imitates any people (in their actions) is considered to be one of them.”

[Abu Dawud 16/1471]

 

Source: al-Fataawa al-Muhimmah: Chapter of Libaas wa Zeenah, p. 758.

 

 

Balancing between Seeking Knowledge and Softening the Heart— Ibn al-Jawzi

October 10, 2016 Leave a comment

Imam abu’l-Faraj ibn a-Jawzi, in his book Sayd al-Khaatir, wrote the following on the importance of softening the heart in the midst of talab al-’ilm (seeking knowledge):

رأيت الاشتغال بالفقه وسماع الحديث لا يكاد يكفي في صلاح القلب إلا أن يمزج بالرقائق والنظر في سير السلف الصالحين‏.‏ لأنهم تناولوا مقصود النقل وخرجوا عن صور الأفعال المأمور بها إلى ذوق معانيها والمراد بها‏.

I feel that occupying oneself with fiqh and acquiring narrations is hardly enough to rectify the heart, unless one mixes with that the study of al-raqaa’iq (heart-softening narrations) and examining the biographies of the salaf al-saaliheen, because they [i.e. the Salaf] realized the intended purpose of those narrations and extracted the commanded actions from them, perceiving their intended meanings and desired understandings thereby.

 

 

‏ وما أخبرتك بهذا إلا بعد معالجة وذوق لأني وجدت جمهور المحدثين وطلاب الحديث همة أحدهم في الحديث العالي وتكثير الأجزاء‏.‏ وجمهور الفقهاء في علوم الجدل وما يغالب به الخصم‏.‏ وكيف يرق القلب مع هذه الأشياء‏.‏

And I do not inform you of this except after personal trials and error, because I have found that the majority of the muhadditheen and students of hadeeth are primarily concerned with the shortest chain of narration and increasing the number of narrations. And that the majority of the fuqahaa’(jurists) are primarily concerned with knowledge of debate, argumentation and how to win an a dispute. And how can hearts by softened with these things?

 

 

وقد كان جماعة من السلف يقصدون البعد الصالح للنظر إلى سمته وهديه‏.‏ لا لاقتباس وذلك أن ثمرة علمه هديه وسمته فافهم هذا وامزج طلب الفقه والحديث بمطالعة سير السلف والزهاد في الدنيا ليكون سبباً لرقة قلبك‏.‏

And there used to be a group of the salaf who would visit a righteous servant in order to observe his characteristics and manners, and not to take knowledge from him. And that is because the fruits of his knowledge were his manners and conduct, so understand this! So combine the study of fiqh and hadeeth with studying the lives of the salaf and those who exercises zuhd in this dunya in order that this might be a cause of softening for your heart.

 

 

وقد جمعت لكل واحد من مشاهير الأخيار كتاباً فيه أخباره وآدابه‏.‏ فجمعت كتاباً في أخبار الحسن وكتاباً في أخبار سفيان الثوري وإبراهيم بن أدهم وبشر الحافي وأحمد بن حنبل ومعروف وغيرهم من العلماء والزهاد والله الموفق للمقصود‏.‏ ولا يصلح العمل مع قلة العلم‏.‏ فهما في ضرب المثل كسائق وقائد والنفس بينهما حرون ومع جد السائق والقائد ينقطع المنزل ونعوذ بالله من الفتور‏.‏

And I have compiled a book for each and every one of the well-known and excellent people, containing their tales and their manners. I have compiled a book about the exploits of al-Hasan (al-Basri), and a book about the exploits of Sufyan al-Thawri, Ibrahim ibn Adhham, Bishr al-Haafi, Ahmad ibn Hanbal, Ma’roof, and others from the ‘ulamaa’and those who were known for their zuhd, and Allah is the giver of success. And deeds are not performed correctly with (only) a little knowledge. And what should be understood (from all this speech) is in the parable of a stick and a carrot [i.e. a push-factor and a pull-factor, one thing which is motivating you by fear and another which is motivating you with a reward], and a person’s soul is stubbornly in between the two. But with a persistent stick and carrot, one can keep moving, and we seek refuge with Allah from apathy.

 

[Sayd al-Khaatir 1/71]

 

Connotative meanings of patience —Ibn Qayyim

July 25, 2016 Leave a comment

 

Patience takes on the name what it refers to. Different names may be applied to patience in different situations. Ibn Qayyim (rahimahullah) has beautifully mentioned few examples here:

 

Patience is called chastity if it is associated with restraining a sexual desire.

 

Patience is called self-restraint if it refers to controlling one’s stomach.

 

When referring to refraining from disclosing what is better to keep secret, it is called keeping one’s secret.

 

If it consists of being content with what is sufficient for one’s needs, it is called asceticism.

 
If it consists of being content of what someone has of worldly life, it is called self-content.

 

If it refers to controlling one’s nerves when angry, it is called forbearance.

 
When it refers to detesting from haste, it is called gracefulness.

 
If it refers to not fleeing or running away, it is called courage.

 

If it refers to refraining from taking revenge, it is called forgiveness.

 

If it refers to not being stingy, it is called generosity.

 

When it refers to abstaining from food and drink for a specific period, it is called fasting.

 

If it consists of refraining from being helpless and lazy, it is called discretion.

 

If it refers to refraining from loading other people’s burden it is called chivalry.

 

In conclusion, patience has various names according to the situation it applies to, but all of them are included under patience. This indicates that all tenants and rites of Islam are associated with patience.

 
[Taken from “The way to patience and gratitude”, by Ibn Qayyim, pg. 21-22]

 

Different definitions of patience

July 13, 2016 Leave a comment

No matter how severe affliction or excessive joy a Muslim may get, he is supposed to be patient or grateful. But to be patient, we should know what patience means.

 

Ibn Qayyim says:

“Man, by nature, prefers prosperity but when he meets with affliction which is inevitable, patience is the best quality.”

Patience has very vast meaning and understood differently by different scholars. Mentioned below are few basic simple definition of patience.

 

Al-Junaid:

“Patience is to keep calmly content while facing affliction.”

 

Dhu-Nun:

“Patience is to restrain yourself from ill-conduct, remain quiet during affliction and without complaining.”

 

Abu Uthman:

“The one who has patience is the one who had trained himself to handle hardship.” 

 

Amr ibn Uthman al-Makki:

“Patience means to keep close to Allah & to accept calmly the trials He sends, without complaining or feeling sad.”

 

Ruwaim:

“Patience means to refrain from complaining.”

 

Abu Muhammed Al-Hariri:

“Patience means that there is no difference in behavior in times of prosperity & that of adversity & to be content at all times.”

 

Abu Ali Ad-Daqqaq:

“Patience means not to object to your fate.”

 

Al-Khawwas:

“Patience is to adhere to the injunctions of the Quran and Sunnah.”

 

Prophet Muhammed (ﷺ) said:

“No one had ever been given anything better than patience.”

[Bukhari and Muslim]

 

[Taken from “The way to patience and gratitude”, by Ibn Qayyim, pg. 14-16 ]

The definition of sincerity— Sh. Salih al-Munajjid

February 13, 2016 Leave a comment

 

Linguistically: It is extracted from the verb (Akhlas) whose source is (Ikhlaas), which means to make pure and not mixed with anything else.

 

This is why Chapter Al-Ikhlaas was given this name, because it emphasizes the Oneness of Allah and that He should be worshipped alone. Ibn Al-Atheer (rahimahullah) said:

“It was given this name because the one who recites it purifies his monotheism to Allah.”

The word Ikhlaas is the word of Tawheed (monotheism).

 

Al-Fayrooz Abaadi (rahimahullah) said:

“Akhlasa means to give up Riyaa’ (showing off) [i.e. offer worship purely for Allah].”

Al-Qaamoos Al-Muheet (797).

 

Al-Jurjaani (rahimahullah) said:

“Ikhlaas is to give up Riyaa’ when offering acts of worship.”

At-Ta’reefaat (28).

 

Technically: In Islamic terminology, the scholars defined it in different ways, and the following are the most important of these definitions:

Ibn Al-Qayyim (rahimahullah)  said:

“Ikhlaas is to purify one’s intention when worshiping Allah and devote the act purely for Him.”

Madaarij As-Saalikeen (91/2).

 

Al-Jurjaani (rahimahullah) said:

“Ikhlaas means to cleanse the heart from any defect or impurity that affects its purity.”

It was also said that Ikhlaas is to scrub away anything that affects its clarity.

At-Ta’reefaat (28).

 

Huthayfah Al-Mar’ashi (rahimahullah)  said:

“Ikhlaas is when the slave feels that performing a deed is the same for him whether he performs it in public or in seclusion.”

Al-Bayaan Fi Aadaab Hamalat Al-Qur’aan (13).

 

Others said:

“Ikhlaas is not to expect any reward from anyone for the deed you perform and to want anyone to see the deed except Allah.”

Madaarij As-Saalikeen (92/2).

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In addition to this, there are many other definitions, which were stated by the righteous Salaf, may Allah have mercy upon them, such as:

1. To perform the deed for Allah and not to join anyone with Him in the intention
2. To perform the deed without people noticing.

Madaarij As-Saalikeen (91-92/2).

 

A sincere person is the one who does not care if people stop caring or respecting him in return for reforming and purifying his heart and making it sound in the scale of Allah. Also, he does not like that people know about anything he does, even if it is as small and minor as the weight of an ant.
It is very common in Islamic texts to use the word intention instead of the word sincerity. For jurists, intention in principle means to differentiate between acts of worship and habits when performing a deed, and it is to differentiate between acts of worship amongst themselves.

Jaami’ Al-‘Uloom Wal-Hikam (11/1)

 

Differentiating between acts of worship and habits when performing a deed, is like differentiating between taking a bath to clean one’s body or as a ritual bath to cleanse himself from impurity due to sexual intercourse or a wet dream. Differentiating between acts of worship amongst themselves, is like differentiating between praying four Rak’ahs for Dhuhr from those for ‘Asr.

 

However, if the word intention is used as a means to find out who is meant by performing a deed: is it performed purely and sincerely for the sake of Allah or not, then in this case intention is included and part of the definition of sincerity.

Truthfulness and sincerity when performing an act of worship have close meanings, but the difference is that sincerity takes place after one starts performing the deed, while truthfulness is usually before the deed starts. Therefore, sincerity branches out of truthfulness.

At-Ta’reefaat (28).

 

[From the book: Sincerity, page 4-7, by Sh. Salih al-Munajjid]

 

 

Different kinds of humility

January 1, 2016 Leave a comment

 

Humility is one of the greatest blessings that Allaah can bestow upon His slave. He says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And by the Mercy of Allaah, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you”

[Aal ‘Imraan 3:159]

 

“And verily, you (O Muhammad) are on an exalted (standard of) character”

[al-Qalam 68:4]

 

This refers to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) being a true slave of Allah in many ways and his treating all people with the utmost kindness. His character was one of complete humility based on sincerity towards Allah and compassion towards the slaves of Allah, which was the complete opposite of the characteristics of the proud and arrogant.

Al-Majmoo’ al-Kaamilah li Mu’allafaat al-Shaykh al-Sa’di, 5/442, 443

 

There are many means of attaining humility, which no Muslim adopts but he will attain this characteristic. They were explained by Imam Ibn al-Qayyim as follows:

Humility comes from knowing about Allah and His names and attributes, and His greatness, venerating Him, loving Him and being in awe of Him; and also from knowing about oneself and one’s faults, and weaknesses. From that may develop the attitude of humility, which means feeling helpless before Allah, and being humble and compassionate towards His slaves, so that the person does not feel superior towards anyone, or think that he has any rights over anyone else; rather he thinks that others are better than him, and that their rights come before his. This is a characteristic that Allah gives to those whom He loves, honours and draws close to Him.

Al-Rooh, p. 233.

 

There are many reports which speak of the reward of humility. For example:

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

“Wealth does not decrease because of charity, and Allah increases His slave in honour when he forgives others. And no one humbles himself before Allah but Allah will raise him (in status).”

Narrated by Muslim, 2588. Al-Nawawi included it in a chapter entitled: “The recommendation of forgiveness and humility.”

Al-Nawawi said:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “And no one humbles himself before Allaah but Allaah will raise him (in status).” This is understood in two ways: the first is that He will raise him (in status) in this world, and give him status in people’s hearts because of his humility, and give him a high status in people’s eyes. The second is that what is meant is his reward in the Hereafter, where his status will be raised because of his humility in this world.

The scholars said: It may be that both are meant, (and that his status will be raised) both in this world and in the Hereafter. And Allaah knows best.

Sharh Muslim, 16/142.

 

Humility may mean various things, such as:

1.     A person humbling himself to the commands and prohibitions of Allaah, doing what He commands and avoiding what He forbids. 

Ibn al-Qayyim said:

Because a person may hesitate to obey His commands out of laziness, thus behaving in a reluctant way in an attempt to flee from servitude towards Allah, and his soul may have the desire to commit haraam actions, but when  the person humbles himself to the commands and prohibitions of Allah, he will humble himself to true submission (‘uboodiyyah).

Al-Rooh p. 233.

 

2.     Humbling oneself before the might, majesty and power of Allah. 

Ibn al-Qayyim said:

Every time he feels that he is great, he remembers the might of Allah and that might belongs to Him only, and he remembers His intense anger against those who compete with Him in that, then he humbles himself before Him and submits to the might of Allah. This is the ultimate humility and inevitably includes the first type of humility mentioned above, but the converse can never apply (i.e., this type of humility inevitably leads to the first type, but a person may submit to the commands and prohibitions of Allah but he does not humble himself before His might).

The one who is truly humble is the one who is blessed with both. And Allaah is the One Whose help we seek.

Al-Rooh, p. 233.

 

3.     Humility in one’s dress and manner of walking. 

It was narrated from Ibn ‘Umar that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

“Whilst a man was letting his garment drag out of pride, he was swallowed up by the earth and will continue sinking in it until the Day of Resurrection.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3297.

It was also narrated by al-Bukhaari (5452) and Muslim (2088) from the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah. According to the version narrated by al-Bukhaari:

“Whilst a man was walking in a garment admiring himself with his hair nicely combed, Allah caused (the earth) to swallow him up and he will continue sinking in it until the Day of Resurrection.”

 

4.     Humility towards one who is of a lesser status and helping him  

It was narrated that al-Bara’ ibn ‘Aazib said:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was moving soil with us on the day of al-Ahzaab, and I saw him with dust covering the whiteness of his stomach, and he (the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)) was saying, “(O Allah)! Without You, we would not have been guided, nor would we have given in charity, nor would we have prayed. So (O Allah!) send tranquility (Sakeenah) upon us as they (the chiefs of the enemy tribes) have rebelled against us. And if they intend affliction (i.e. want to frighten us and fight against us) then we would not (flee but would withstand them).” And he raised his voice whilst saying it.

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6809; Muslim, 1803.

 

5.     Humility in interactions with one’s wife and helping her. 

It was narrated that al-Aswad said: I asked ‘Aa’ishah what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to do in his house, and she said:

He used to serve his family and when the time for prayer came he would go out and pray.

al-Bukhaari, 644.

 

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said:

This shows that we are encouraged to be humble and not arrogant, and that a man should serve his family.

Fath al-Baari, 2/163

 

6.     Humility towards the young and joking with them. 

It was narrated that Anas said:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was the best of people in character. I had a brother whose name was Abu ‘Umayr. He said, I think he was weaned, and when he (the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him)) came he would say, “O Abu Umayr, what happened to the nughayr (a small bird that he kept as a pet)?”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5850; Muslim, 2150.

 

Al-Nawawi said:

The nughayr is a small bird.

This hadeeth teaches us many things, such as being kind to small children. This demonstrates the good character of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and how he was of noble character and humble.

Sharh Muslim, 14/129

 

7.     Humility towards servants and slaves 

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“If the servant of one of you brings his food and he does not want to make him sit and eat with him, then let him offer him a morsel or two, because he has prepared it and served it.”

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2418 and 5144; Muslim, 1663.

We ask Allaah to make us among those who humble themselves before His might.

 

Source: Islam-qa

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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